Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Three Cheers!

Well, ding-dong the witch is dead. Jerry Falwell has gone to meet his maker: evolution, which resulted in the many microorganisms who will happily feast on that villain’s disgusting remains.

But who now will tell us which of the Teletubbies is a homosexual? Or reveal that the Antichrist is most likely a currently living male Jew? Who else can bilk millions of ignorant followers into contributing dollar after dollar to religio-fascistic causes, or threaten believers with an eternity in hell if they dare to even think of voting for a Democrat? What man or woman is left to proudly condone preemptive nuclear strikes on countries whose non-Christian peoples are the “enemies of god”? What voice will cry that there’s a conspiracy to steal Christmas? What smug, hate-filled demagogue will explain away the worst manmade and natural disasters as Jesus’s personal revenge against “pagans, abortionists, and the gays and lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle,” or claim that “the ACLU’s got to take a lot of blame” for the 9/11 terrorist attacks?

No longer will we Americans get to hear words of wisdom like:

  • The idea that religion and politics don’t mix was invented by the Devil to keep Christians from running their own country.
  • If you’re not a born-again Christian, you’re a failure as a human being.
  • Textbooks are Soviet propaganda.
  • The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews.
  • It appears that America's anti-Biblical feminist movement is at last dying, thank God, and is possibly being replaced by a Christ-centered men's movement which may become the foundation for a desperately needed national spiritual awakening.
  • It is God's planet - and he's taking care of it. And I don't believe that anything we do will raise or lower the temperature one point.
  • I hope I live to see the day when, as in the early days of our country, we won't have any public schools. The churches will have taken them over again and Christians will be running them. What a happy day that will be!
Well, he didn't live to see that, but, oh, what a happy day this is. In some small way, the world has been made a better—and smarter—place. Hurrah!

ADDENDUM (9:17 p.m. EDT): Now that I’ve had a chance to look over Blogworld’s reaction to this vile monster’s demise, I’m fascinated by how many bloggers, myself included, quoted “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead.” Why did that specific meme spring so readily to mind? I think it’s because the lyric is one of the few examples in popular culture of general jubilation over someone’s death. Normally, we all tend to show “respect for the departed,” at least for a little while. But millions of people — atheists, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, Wiccans, feminists, environmentalists, peace-lovers, homosexuals, women in need of abortions, sufferers who would benefit from stem-cell research, Democrats, Liberals, Libertarians, the poor, the sick, the helpless, and all who deplore the purposeful spread of ignorance — were relentlessly targeted by that glib son-of-a-bitch who used his governmental connections to sow hatred and superstition at every opportunity. We’re all delighted to see that bastard finally board the outbound broomstick. As the song says: “Yo ho, let’s open up and sing, and ring the bells out!”

18 comments:

chris said...

I like it. Probably echoed what a lot of people are thinking, but most are afraid to say. Or even admit it to themselves.

tina said...

I know his family will mourn his death but I won't. I didn't know too much about him until his death, through all the bloggers out there. He was an intolerant person to say the least.

tga said...

Yep, a good day it is!!!

TK said...

Any Hemingway fans out there?

"Never send for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee."

In other words, any man's death diminishes me, for I am part of mankind.

Just sayin, as reprehensible an asshat as he was, I sense something unseemly here. And I reiterate, he was a reprehensible asshat.

That being said, anybody hear the 6:00PM CBS radio news tonite?

"He was an evangelical preacher who founded a church in 1956 in a former bottling plant, but he evolved...."

Say WHAT?!?!?!?!

ReallyEvilCanine said...

No longer will we Americans get to hear words of wisdom like...
Yes, yes they will. He paved the way for all the scum to follow. Phelps, Dobson, Robertson, Thomas, and all the rest of their hate-mongering ilk.


That man's death removed one voice which promoted bigotry and thrived on intolerance. Good riddance.

anti-nonsense said...

Heh yeah, "Ding dong the witch is dead" was basically my first thought. I can't help being pleased that that fucking bigoted homophobic nutjob is finally gone even though I feel a tad guility about it.

BlackSun said...

Nice job!

Sarge said...

Problem with Falell is that he's just one man. His talent was that he could gather like minded people around him, articulate their fear, anger and ignorance, and do their thinking for them. He simply found a way to get power and keep it by preaching to the choir.

As REC said one down...but many more to go. Y'all be careful, hear?

Alyx said...

For "socially-acceptable" Jubilation Over Someone's Death, I recommend the appropriate scene in the Albert Finney musical Scroog" -- the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come is showing him the crowd's reaction to hearing about his (Scrooge's) death, and they are all dancing jubilantly through the street, singing "Thank you very much, thank you very much, that's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me!".

The boy with the tambourine said...

CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS on The DEATH of JERRY FALWELL-CNN 360

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