Friday, May 23, 2008

Puzzling Atheists #5: Some Woo

This is a puzzle to test your knowledge of woo.

Each numbered item leads to a term that’s related to woo in some fashion. All you have to do is supply the term. They’re clearly spelled out, so you can consider the numbered tidbits of woo as a gift from WWW.

Unfortunately, since this is a Woo Puzzle, I've had to acknowledge that God works in mysterious ways. So every consonant has been replaced with a W, and every vowel has been replaced with an O. That is, except for the letters W and O, which have been replaced by one another. For the purposes of this puzzle, Y is always considered a consonant. Thus, the word WOO would be written as OWW and the word WOW would be written as OWO. GOD, by the way, would be written as WWW. For ease of reading, if a term contains more than one word, the words are separated by an underline: _.

As an extra help — because we’re all atheists here, aren’t we? — all As have been left alone. So the word HALLELUJAH would be written as WAWWOWOWAW. Leave your solutions in the comments section. To give everyone a chance, though, please post no more than four answers at a time. I’ll give credit to the first person who identifies each term.

Some Woo

  1. You’ll be a black sheep if you mix this with linen: OWWW
  2. A Roman’s dad: WWWO
  3. He was given the laws on which the Constitution is based: WWWOW
  4. She’ll fuck up the whole world, not just Babylon: OWWWO
  5. God's not a comedian, but this is a pretty good rib: OWWAW
  6. You can babble forever, but this won’t get you to heaven: WWOOW
  7. His witnesses don’t call him this: WAWOOW
  8. He never goes commando: WWWWWW
  9. Pasco County can teach a lesson to this guy, but not vice versa: OOWAWW
  10. Try this stuff even if you’re not thirsty: WWWW-AOW
  11. Don’t do this to anybody except God: OWWWWOW
  12. He was designed, but not with a Phillip’s head screwdriver: WWWWWWW
  13. This really kills a person: AWWWWOWW
  14. Israel — or America: WWWW_WAWW
  15. Oh, you, it makes no difference. Don’t dare to draw him out: WWWAWWAW
  16. Maybe not now, but this uprising is coming soon: AWWWAWWWWO
  17. A committed Christian or Muslim: WAWAWW _WWAWA
  18. We can conceive of God having this kind of an argument: WWWWWWWOWAW
  19. All Americans should believe in him: WOWWWO_O._WOWW
  20. Half a dozen of these could surely make our world today: WWWOWAWW_WOAWW
One non-woo tip: Prayer won't help you solve these.

[Update: All items have been de-wooed, but I'm not listing the answers here in case any of you latecomers want to give these a try. You can look through the comments to find the solutions.]
[The
A-List: 1. Renacier; 2. Paul; 3. Renacier; 4. Renacier; 5. SI; 6. Renacier; 7. Ubi Dubium; 8. nowoo; 9. nowoo; 10. SI; 11. SI; 12. nowoo; 13. Sesquipedal; 14. Ubi Dubium; 15. nowoo; 16. Ubi Dubium; 17. nowoo; 18. Sesquipedal; 19. Ubi Dubium; 20. Sesquipedal]

29 comments:

Renacier said...

I'll just take the easy ones, thank you.

1. Wool
3. Moses
4. Whore
6. Tower

The Exterminator said...

renacier:
Correct for all four. I'm assuming that Asta helped.

Ubi Dubium said...

7. Yahweh
14. Holy Land
16. Apocalypse
19. George W. Bush

Yes?

Spanish Inquisitor said...

5. Woman
10. Kool-Aid
11. Worship

The Exterminator said...

Ubi:
Yes. To paraphrase Sinatra, "ooby dooby doo."

SI:
Yes for you, too.

Paul said...

2. Pope

Maybe?

The Exterminator said...

Paul:
Bless you, my son. You're right.

nowoo said...

17. Barack Obama

The Exterminator said...

nowoo:
Right. Or should I say: Wright?

nowoo said...

9. Wizard

nowoo said...

12. Robocop

The Exterminator said...

nowoo:
Correct on 9.

Your answer for 12 does follow the rules perfectly, and may even answer the clue -- although I'm not sure what tools were used to assemble that guy. Also, as someone once said to Robocop: "Funny, you don't look woo-ish."

In any case, creative though it is, it's not the solution I had in mind.

Sesquipedal said...

20. ontological

nowoo said...

8. Mormon

The Exterminator said...

sesqui:
You've answered number 18, of course. I'm giving you credit, even though you mistyped the number, because you cracked what I consider to be one of the hardest clues here. It's also my favorite.

nowoo said...

12. Johnson

The Exterminator said...

nowoo:
Numbers 8 and 12 are correct. You're on fire now. Is Satan giving you the answers down there?

Sesquipedal said...

haha, sorry about that.
20. thousand years ... as in the creationist canon?

Robert said...

13. Aphorism.....?

The Exterminator said...

Sesqui:
Exactly. And you typed the correct number this time. (Or do you just always key in "20"?)

I really didn't expect any one person to get both 18 and 20 correct. Great wordplay skills.

Challenge: Can you beat everyone else to numbers 13 and 15?

nowoo said...

15. Mohammad

The Exterminator said...

Robert:
Your solution fits the rules, but not the clue. Unless you're talking about the Texas Saw Massacre.

nowoo:
Yup. Fatwa to follow.

nowoo said...

13. Apoplexy?

The Exterminator said...

nowoo:
In what way is apoplexy woo-related, except insofar as that's what woo gives us?

Try again.

Sesquipedal said...

13. abortion :)

The Exterminator said...

Sesqui:
You got it. Congratulations.

nowoo said...

That was fun. Thanks for the puzzle!

The Exterminator said...

nowoo:
Thank you for playing. I have no idea how you got all those answers so quickly. My wife looked at the puzzle before I posted it and told me I was nuts to think that anyone could figure these out. But I had faith in the faith-free.

If I ever assemble a puzzle-solving team, I'll want you to be on it.

PhillyChief said...

Damn, that went fast